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We have an almost-emergency happening at our house. It’s my fault, really. I started it and now I’ve got to deal with the consequences. Actually, if you really want to blame someone, I suppose I could shift it onto my mother’s shoulders. It was her idea. She actually actively pursued the situation in which I find myself. It all started with “Binky Camp.”
When Eva was born, she took a pacifier for about 15 seconds. Then she decided they were stupid and began gagging violently every time I tried to put one in her mouth. I continued on with this fruitless endeavor only because I come from a “Binky Culture,” where children who squawk get a piece of rubber between their lips. Plus it is well known that newborns relish 2-3 hours a day of “non-nutritive sucking.” AND it decreases the SIDS risk. But after a couple weeks I stopped bothering and we were happy, albeit moderately frustrated during those moments when Eva clearly needed some self-soothing activity and was at a complete loss.
My mother, however, refused to believe that a baby wouldn’t take a Binky. (OK, I admit that I’ve rolled my eyes a few times when parents told me that as well. I mean, what baby doesn’t take a pacifier? Seriously.) So at Christmas we arrived at my parents’ house to find an actual Binky Display. Every imaginable shape and size pacifier was laid out on the kitchen table. And my mother spent the next 72 hours trying, in vain I add, to get Eva to do anything other than act like she was having a large stick shoved down her throat. At the end of the weekend, even Grandma was willing to accept defeat and the Binky nonsense ended. For a month.
Then, suddenly out of nowhere, Eva started taking her Bink. Not the standard pacifier, but only the Soothie kind they give you in the hospital. And she used it to go to sleep. And I could stick it in her mouth when she made noise. Everyone was happy. Except for one little thing.
They don’t sell “Soothies” in the UK, where we live. We’ve been surviving on the occasional “Binky Care Package” from the States. But you know what happens to pacifiers over time. They get lost, they fall out of the stroller, they get stolen by another kid at the park. (I actually found one on the sidewalk in our neighborhood and put it in my purse, hoping that it was my own child’s, so precious as they are. We haven’t used it but it’s still in there.)
So here’s the situation: we’re down to one (ONE) Binky. Grandma and Grandpa arrive Monday. Either they come with a bag of Eva’s preferred style and color or we’re going to have a rough few days heading our way. Then again, it would save me the trouble of having to break this habit in another few months…
Dr. Lara Zibners, Aug 19, 2010
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So in keeping with our current theme: the Breastfeeding Nazi and the Liquid Poison, I thought I should make a few comments about something you may have seen in the grocery or on TV: toddler “Follow On Formula.” What is it? Who’s it for? Will my kids be getting it? Answers: A nutritious drink. Little kids over the age of 1. Highly doubtful. Should I clarify?
In the US, the current recommendation is to keep a baby on breast milk or formula until at least one year of age. Before about age 1, regular cow’s milk is not only lacking in essential nutrients not normally found in an infant’s diet elsewhere, but can also be too hard on their little tummies, kidneys and the like. After age 1, most little bodies are able to handle regular cow’s milk without trouble unless you’re unlucky and have a little allergic tot. The recommendations continue that young children between age 1 and 2 to 3 years drink only full-fat dairy products because fat is an important tool in building a developing brain. After age 2, your kid can probably drink whatever the family prefers.
I’ll pause just a bit to remind you that a toddler (age 1-3) should have around 2-3 dairy servings a day. That’s 16-24 ounces of milk, or yogurt, cheese and ice cream. (I slipped that one in myself. The AAP doesn’t really list ice cream. But it’s a valid source of fat and calcium! I also consider the slice of cheesecake the girls ate Sunday as a serving.) By the way, there is such a thing as “too much” milk, so be careful not to let fat and calcium edge out all the other essential components of a healthy tot.
Okay, so back to toddler milk, follow-on formula or whatever it’s called. What is it? Well, it’s basically milk that is fortified with iron and vitamins. Okay, that sounds good. Cow’s milk is not a good source of iron and parents worry about that. Vitamins sound okay. Sure. Why not?
I’ll explain why we’ll probably be skipping it. See, Mommy has a shoe habit. It’s not out of control but it’s still a dominant factor in my closet. And shoes aren’t cheap. Toddler milk is fine if you are really worried about your child getting enough nutrition. However, Dr. Zibners is quite confident that a standard toddler diet (yes, even with “green only” week) will meet most kid’s needs. And cow’s milk is a lot cheaper than toddler formula. Do you see where I’m going with this? In other words, if it makes you sleep at night because your kid had a cup of “follow-on” milk, then fine. But it’s not necessary. So long as Mommies have feet.
Dr. Lara Zibners, Aug 17, 2010
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I feel I must pause here in my “Breast is Best but Formula ain’t Poison” tirade to talk a little about some news that’s been making headlines. No, not about the guy up in Maine with a pea sprout in his lung (although that’s cool and all), but about the outbreak of salmonella infections that have been traced to dry pet food. Nearly everything we eat is a possible source of infection, from chicken to spinach to bean sprouts to oysters (salmonella, E. coli, E. coli, Hepatitis A, respectively). Life is dangerous that way. But you know there was some bored dude sitting in the newsroom looking for a story and “children poisoned by pet food” certainly seems like something he could get a little mileage from.
Let me talk about food poisoning quickly. The most common type of “food poisoning” is an acute vomiting and diarrhea illness that comes on about 4-6 hours after eating (ruining a good slumber) and lasts for about a day. Most people, children included, survive intact, although become a little wary of their neighborhood Italian. However, other types of food borne illness can cause serious problems, and even rarely be fatal in certain people, such as the very young, very old or medically unwell. Salmonella is one type of infection that can cause serious illness in susceptible individuals.
Now there is no need to panic, since I’m positive you’ve got some live little salmonella living in your house right now. No? Do you have eggs? Right. Most good kitchen hygiene deals with whatever bugs come into our home (like not licking the knife you used to chop the raw chicken) and our immune systems handle the rest. It’s the rare and unfortunate individual that actually gets sick from something encountered on their dinner plate. And sorry to say, there is apparently a less-than-perfect salmonella control system in place for the makers of dry dog food.
But what I really find fascinating about this news story is not that some kids got sick from eating dog food. I mean, who hasn’t dipped into the dog bowl? What I find fascinating is that over 40% of these salmonella infections were in children. More than 40% were kids? Then who, pray tell, were the other 55%? Drunk teenagers? Culinary adventurers? Serious pet lovers?
Anyway, if your kid eats dog food, don’t freak out. Don’t encourage it but don’t panic because most pet food is harmless when ingested as an accidental meal. Bloody diarrhea, fever, and acting very ill are all signs that you should be calling your doctor. But for the majority of kids who find their way into the kibble, it’s not an issue. Unless, of course, your kid is 22 and stoned. Then, I’d worry.
Dr. Lara Zibners, Aug 15, 2010
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On the tails of my “Gisele Rant,” I thought I’d address the issue of infant formula. Is it a miracle or is it a chemical poison? (The German word for “poison,” FYI, is “Gift.”) I have said it before and I’ll say it again; Breast is Best. Breast milk is the perfect food for immature human beings. In the same way that rabbit milk is the perfect food for baby rabbits. Mother Nature just works that way. Breast milk provides the right combination of nutrients to support a developing infant. As a baby grows, the milk changes to adapt to the baby’s needs. Bonus feature is the presence of important antibodies passed from Mom to kid to help protect an immature little immune system. Okay, so we get that I like breast milk. So why would I ever advocate the use of formula? I’ll tell you.
Before my first daughter was born, I underwent a frightful experience called “induced lactation.” Basically I took a combination of hormones and then began pumping, about 2 months before she was due to be born. (For those just tuning in, I’m the mother of two gorgeous girls, neither of whom sprang from this womb.) The process of getting breast milk out of my body was interesting from a scientific view, horrifying from a perspective of reality. The key to anyone producing milk is frequency. Hence the pump “backpack” that became my permanent purse. I pumped in taxis, trains, cars, restrooms, and airplanes. And I made milk. At my peak I was pumping 10 times a day and making a whole 2 ounces every 24 hours. Wow! Eat up kids! Dinner is served!
It’s not hard to see how formula became the mainstay of my daughter’s diet. By the time Eva was 6 weeks old, I’d had it. Maybe the clue that it was time to quit was when my family put a Santa hat on my breast pump to take a photo of “my other child.” Eva got cut off and everything went into the freezer for Zoe. When Zoe was born (13 weeks after Eva!), I offered her the option of breastfeeding. She politely declined once she realized that 4 ounces came all at once in a bottle. I defrosted my “stash” and she finished it in about 2 days. Oink.
So why am I sharing this very personal story with you? It is because I want you to understand how deeply I believe in breastfeeding. But also to understand that sometimes there is a very real need for formula. If you see a woman in the mall feeding a baby from a bottle, you can’t know if that was a personal choice based on a cultural factor, whether that child is adopted, whether she has an underlying health condition that requires medications or whether she had a mastectomy due to cancer. It’s hard to be a Mom who can’t breastfeed in today’s world of the Gisele Bundchens. But it’s important to remember that breastfeeding is just a small part of being a mother.
And in that sense, formula is a miracle. It has allowed women the freedom to return to the work force. It has enabled mothers who can’t bear children to become a parent. It has meant that single Dad’s can raise happy, healthy children. So to that I say, three cheers for my kids’ “chemical diet.”
And later this week: do I really need to buy the fancy brand name stuff or will a jug of Safeway Select do the trick?
Dr. Lara Zibners, Aug 10, 2010
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Apparently I’m not the only one who was offended by Ms. Bundchen. I can’t open a website or a newspaper without an article by another woman who found her comments about mandatory breastfeeding to be a bit insensitive. Yes, it’s all well and good to say, “breast is best.” Because it is. But women who can’t breastfeed, for whatever reason, the guilt is already there. No need to rub it in. Unfortunately, guilt is a part of parenting. Am I spending enough time with her? Should I buy the organic berries even though they look like crap? Do I have to go to the gym to burn off the cupcake I brought home for my kid but then felt too guilty to give to her so I ate it? (Okay, that is probably only me.) Doubt, guilt, uncertainty. It’s called parenting.
However, for some folks (and I don’t say Moms because I’m sure that some Dads get it too), these feeling can become overwhelming. I just got a note from a dear friend who confessed that she is finally getting treatment for post-partum depression. It’s about time, since her baby turns one in a few weeks. But it took that long for Pal X to realize that her sadness and anxiety, her short temper and feelings of wanting to escape were something more than just “a bad day.” Post-partum depression is a real condition and can last for weeks to months. Even moms who didn’t actually give birth can suffer from it, overwhelmed by the appearance of a seemingly small and helpless creature who is, in fact, rather demanding and can’t tell time.
I just wanted to throw that out there this week because you all know that my message is “relax. Let them eat dirt.” But just in case you are feeling like you can’t get out of bed and face the day, or know someone who is so overwhelmed they can’t enjoy being a parent, then don’t be afraid to seek out some help. Life is too short to worry about what others think of your weaknesses. (Or that your kid is drinking from a bottle!)
Later this week we’ll talk formula. Poison or miracle?
Dr. Lara Zibners, Aug 08, 2010
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