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Grumpy Old Men

And I bring you Part Two: flying alone with infants. Is it brave or just stupid? You be the judge. Of course, the real point of this part of my Transatlantic saga is to complain loudly about the miserable mean toad seated next to us on the plane. What kind of person doesn’t like babies? Who doesn’t have even a smidgen of sympathy for a very stressed lady with two babies on an airplane? Especially one who is trying very, very hard to keep her kids happy and quiet. Quiet being the key word.

So, the girls fell asleep at take off and Zoe actually stayed that way for almost 2 hours. (I had binkies at the ready for ear pressure but they don’t really seem to mind and for that I’m mighty grateful. Older kids might need a little gum, drink or a snack to help pop those ears.) Eva woke up as lunch was being served so the two of us shared my salad. She had 3 pieces of garlic bread and a prawn. Then she watched 2 Disney videos. Zoe woke in time to grab some pasta and some fruit. And there we were, only 5 hours left to go.
I stood up and let the girls stretch their legs. Then out came the bag of new toys. Which entertained them for all of 3 minutes. What was far more interesting was the people! Eva pulled herself up and looked over my seat at the man behind us. She happily babbled and clapped. And do you know what he did? This miserable wretch actually looked up and said, “I’d really rather she didn’t do that.”
“What?,” I asked,  a bit surprised.
“I’m trying to watch a film,” he said, with a stiff British accent.
Well excuse me, mister! My kid was looking at you. She didn’t touch you. She didn’t touch your movie screen. She looked at you and smiled, with her adorable 7-tooth grin. She wasn’t crying. Oh no, the crying started when I quickly pulled her down from her perch and tried to entertain her with something else.
It is always on our minds, isn’t it, when we board an airplane and see an infant? There is nothing worse than a crying baby or an out-of-control toddler on a long flight. I’ll admit that it makes me nuts—unless the parent is trying to do something about it and then I just feel guilty for being so selfish. It’s a fact that babies and children exist and are allowed in public places. If you don’t like it, fly private, buddy. As a doctor, I’m often asked for medical advice when flying. (Ear infection? Sedation? That’s yet another conversation!) But as the parent in this situation, I was partly furious, partly embarrassed, partly concerned (100% human!) that I’d really not done my job to the best of my ability. Thank goodness for the flight attendants who kept telling me how well behaved they were and what a good job I was doing. And the bonus was they even watched the girls while I went to the loo. So what’s our lesson here? Most people are kind and good and you shouldn’t be afraid of traveling with your little ones so long as you don’t expect to watch a movie or read a book. I feel sorry for Mr. Toad. He must have a sad life.

 
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